Hungry? Stuff Your Mouth with Mouth Stuffers!

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Hey, you. Yes — you! Are you feeling tired? Lethargic? Don’t have that energy like you use to? Don’t put up with that any longer! FlyTrapMan’s Mouth Stuffers are the perfect solution to this problem! Made from natural and artificial ingredients, it provides you that sought after spark needed to get through the day! What are you waiting for? Stuff your mouth with Mouth Stuffers!

Damn, that was annoying, huh?

I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of advertisements. I’ve been sick of it for quite some time, but an incident the other day really chapped my ass. I was trying to listen to an Alice in Chains song, when this disgustingly horrid 30 second American Idol advertisement popped up and decided I should watch that instead.

I couldn’t skip it, no, no, no. I was forced to sit through this…I can’t even describe it. Words cannot do it justice. To be fair I could have put my tablet down for less than a minute and stretched my arms. Anything would have been more productive, like taking a shit for example. But I didn’t. Instead, I watched the seconds count down on the bottom corner, as my blood simmered and eyes bulged.

What I find interesting to say the least; ad’s always seem to work perfectly, yet the content I’m looking for may load choppy or not at all. Have any of you encountered this strange internet phenomenon? It’s frustratingly baffling.

What really chaps my ass are ‘covert’ ads that are designed in such way to be very subtle on your consciousness, so you don’t even know your being advertised to. Usually this occurs when someone is employed by a sponsor, and they talk or write about a product as if it were their own doing without the monetary motivation.

Those types of ads are blood simmering once you know how to spot them. It takes a little training, but once you’re aware of the concept, you see it happening literally everywhere. There comes a point when advertising becomes intrusive, like a momentarily splinter. I understand advertising makes the world go round, and some people rely on it to make an income.

I get it. Really, I do. But advertising has grown out of control into this perverted marketing monster that is insatiable for cold hard cash.

It’s a bit of a paradox for me: I hate advertisements, yet maybe I’m willing to put up with if its honest. Someone creating a video on a product with the false notion of having you believe they’re doing it with only their good graces is irritating. No — it’s rash inducing.

So, what do you say? Are you feeling hungry by any chance? Buy my Mouth Stuffers! I need the money.

End Rant #16

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About FlyTrapMan (200 Articles)
I have no idea what I'm doing.

2 Comments on Hungry? Stuff Your Mouth with Mouth Stuffers!

  1. Word. I got the same thing trying to listen to ‘Them Bones’.
    But maybe it’s not all so bad yet, remember on Futurama when the full barrage of advertising included having ads slipped into their dreams? =D

    Like

    • Glad I’m not the only one suffering in advertisement hell! I have not seen that particular episode of Futurama, however, the night my dreams start to become graffitied with Coca-Cola ads, is the night I’ll become…very upset.

      Like

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